A kind act composition for primary school
Clevis Wong, P4 (improved version)
Pictures - Reserved seating, Helping blind person cross the road, Saving a cat from a tree
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Below is a picture of DRAFT 2 of the student's composition. Our students go through multiple rewrites to improve their composition writing skills. We have presented the improved version of this draft in this blog. We have highlighted good phrases that were used in this composition.Â
Model composition - Primary 4 - A kind act / deed
Last Sunday morning, my best friend Jeremy and I decided to meet up at the park to play soccer. We met each other at the park and decided to chitchat for a while. The sky was an azure blue, the trees were swaying in the wind, and it was the perfect weather to be there. Jeremy thought that too, and he said the same thing as me. We stood up and walked to the soccer field. I have always been a little afraid of cats, as a cat once pounced on my face and scratched my eye. Little did I know that something unexpected would happen today.
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At first, the both of us were having a whale of a time, passing the ball around and playing soccer. We were cheering so loudly that the entire park could possibly hear our cheers! I wiped the sweat off my brows, and my T-shirt clung to my body as I was sweating buckets. We were getting pretty exhausted, and we wanted to rest. I did not expect what was going to happen next! We could hear piteous meowing from a distance. At first, I was shocked and scared of the meowing, but the meowing sounded urgent. We strained our ears to locate where the urgent meowing sound was coming from. We looked high and low and found a tuxedo cat precariously perched on a tree branch high up in the air! Our jaws dropped, and our faces were as pale as sheets!
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What happened next was unexpected! Out of the blue, the tuxedo cat slipped from the branch and almost fell! The poor cat was now clinging and meowing for its life. Its life was hanging by a thread. If we did not do something, the cat would probably fall to the ground and need to be taken to the vet. Though I was afraid of cats, I knew I had to do the right thing. Jeremy and I racked our brains as quick as lightning for ideas. Finally, I told Jeremy to lift me up and let me grab onto the cat and place it on the ground safely. He agreed to the plan and lifted me up. My heart pounded loudly, and fear etched our faces.
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With trembling hands, I reached out as far as I could. Even though I was afraid of the cat, I mustered enough courage and managed to get a hold of it in the nick of time. Swiftly, Jeremy put me down with the cat cautiously. Relief washed over our faces, and the colour returned. All of a sudden, while we were discussing who would adopt the cat, Just then, somebody suddenly came running worriedly our way. It turned out that somebody was the owner of the tuxedo cat. He informed us that it had run away when he opened the front door to get some fresh air. He thanked us profusely, and we were glad we did the kind deed.